Rheumatoid Arthritis Symptoms Don't Rule My Aud Life

I’m not in contact day to day with another person who has a chronic condition like I have (at least not to my knowledge), so I don’t know what it’s like dealing with a person with an autoimmune disease like Rheumatoid Arthritis. My only point of view is from the side of the sufferer (the sufferer with RA), living with people who don’t have RA.

My post about ‘Arthritis Myths’ sparked this topic for me, when I wrote about how people assume you can’t or shouldn’t do anything anymore. It’s almost as frustrating as the pain in my joints. Most people are either one way or the other; treating me like a child who can’t cross the street without holding hands or not realizing how much pain and fatigue I feel during a major flare-up. There doesn’t seem to be too much of a happy medium, and trying to explain how you feel over and over gets old after a while.

I’m sure that every Rheumatoid Arthritis sufferer feels the same at one point or another. When people first learn that I have RA I’m treated with kid gloves, like I’m going to break into pieces if I do anything more strenuous than sitting down. But in all honesty, most of the time, the more I active I am, the better I feel. I love power walking a few miles every day, yard work and digging in the dirt is bliss for me, and when it comes to power tools, whether construction or destruction… stand back and let me play!

Being able to be independent is certainly important to me, but I’m also not a martyr. When the pain, aches and fatigue are too much for me handle without a grimace, I am usually able to put my stubbornness aside and ask for help, and most of the time help is given. I do remember one person who made a comment about how he didn’t think that Rheumatoid Arthritis hurts that much. I asked him if he’d ever been stung by a bee and he said he had. I asked him if he thought it hurt.

“Of course it did,” he answered.

“Well,” I returned. “My RA is like having bee stings in every joint. Hands, feet, knees, shoulders and elbows.”

That bee must have stung him pretty good because he never made a comment like it again.

I think I can also be honest in saying that I do get jealous of ‘normal’ people who don’t have to get up early just so they can get the stiff soreness worked out before the rest of the family wakes, who get to enjoy a glass of red wine, not have to worry whether the in coming low pressure system will set off a flare up. But I also see the blessing side of it. I’ve discovered that I can handle more than I thought, it’s made me a stronger person, and I’m much more empathetic to other people’s pain.

Living with the “normies” can be challenging, the main challenge being that they just don’t have a sweet clue as to how I am truly feeling, but it’s not their fault; they just aren’t as ‘blessed’ as I am!!

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One way to get my mind off the troubles of arthritis is leaving home and going on vacation, which is just what I’m doing right now. I’m sitting in my cousin’s living room down in beautiful Ridgeway, Ontario just minutes away from Niagara Falls. It’s a lovely, soft evening outside and we’ve just returned from a fun packed day at the Falls.

We decided last week to take a quick trip down to visit family who have a son that our girls have a blast with. Wandering down through Michigan took a bit of Friday afternoon, and we stopped off for the evening outside of Flint where I knew a Red Lobster could be found. It’s been a year since my last crab leg meal and I was ready for another - even though shell fish cause flare ups. I had brought my Tylenol 3’s and dug in with my shell cracker and melted butter. It was so worth it!!

Within 20 minutes I could feel my wrists and elbows start, by the time we returned to the hotel, my knees were yelping, but I wasn’t going to say a word. I promised myself I wouldn’t make a peep and I didn’t! Fortunately it wasn’t too bad, I guess I over estimated the pain  (and that rarely happens).

On the road again the next morning after we found a Tim Horton’s (and in Michigan at that!) With my ‘large with milk’ and my husband’s ‘large with a double’ (that’s Canadian for 2 large coffees, one with milk and one with two creams), it was back to the Ontario border and into heavy traffic.

Today was fabulous! I got to take a long 5 mile walk through the quaint town of Ridgeway this morning. It was perfect, the air was sweet and warm, it was peaceful with birds singing and the occasional passerby saying, “Good Morning!”

The kids were scooped up and it was off to see one of the world’s wonders. They were very impressed and had almost as much fun as us  adults in the wax museums, arcades and other tourist magnets.

I’m having too much fun to been too concerned about the aches and pains. A vacation is a pretty effective Rheumatoid Arthritis treatment for me!

Tomorrow it’s Marine Land, I might even pet a beluga! How cool is that?!

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My husband’s family just celebrated the second annual family reunion this past weekend and what a blast! It was wonderful to see people we haven’t seen in years and some I had never met. Around 100 family members gathered just a few miles north of our hometown at a camp ground and a good time was had by all, from the 7 month old babies to our 92 year old matriarch.

The year before, I ventured to host it at our house; feeding and entertaining 60 people left me exhausted and set me back health wise. This year  I was happy to allow others to plan and take it on! I absolutely love my husband’s family and we are very close, but because of my rheumatoid arthritis, I felt that I could not throw them the party they deserve.

They are a very affectionate, easy going bunch and a constant warm atmosphere seems to over flow when they all get together.  There were races and games for the kids, young and old alike. I don’t know who had more laughs, the gamers or the on lookers; tumbles and spills, trips and sprawls were hilarious and nobody walked away without a cool prize to take home, whether their team finished first or choked in the field.

When it comes to satisfying the stomach, our family is not stingy. Food and drink flowed like Niagara Falls, you name it- it was there and in surplus. Conversation was at record heights, and it didn’t matter how long it had been since you had seen a person, warm embraces erased and shrank the lost time.

It was remarkable to watch my daughters get swept up within minutes by their cousins whom they hadn’t seen since last year. They were a large band of roving, fun seeking boys and girls the entire weekend. Not a peep of discord was heard, and heartfelt sad good byes were given when the weekend was over, along with promises of continued contact.

The children weren’t the only ones bummed out to have to say farewell to each other. We adults felt the pangs as we hugged and reaffirmed our connections and the bonds we share. I adore this family, truly and deeply; even though I’m exhausted, stiff, sore and a little swollen- I’ve got the days counted down until next year!

How about you? What are some traditions, memories and special times you’ve shared with your family?  Our family’s always open to some tips and new ideas, and I’d love to hear them!

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